The Solace Zone

Abusive Marriage

by Leave a Comment

Abusive Marriage.

60% of abusive marriage is as a result of external affairs and comparism.
90% is upbringing and environmental factors.
which makes one of the partner to be tired and will start behaving awkward and acting strange.
the reason you are asked to separate or leave any abusive relationship is because abusiveness is a behavior that is triggered,most times you that is abused don’t know what you did and when you check the reason for such a treatment ,you will know that it is beyond just that and most times the character you have been exhibiting for long.

In a situation the man or woman who is being abused thinks the abuser can change,it will definitely may lead to the death of someone.

Abusive partner can’t just change over night,he or she needs professional help and it is not something that need to be forced, It is something that is voluntary.

Until you identify the main reason why your partner is abusive,you cant help him and if you are unable to identify it please leave and if you are able to identify it,see if it is something that could be change and at that moment, exempt yourself from trigger and seek for safety.

Every one is in one way or the other a product of one abuse or the other but there are people whom have pass the limit and they need help even though most of them dont know that they need help.

A man can be abusive to his wife because of another woman outside and a woman can be abusive to her husband become of comparism.

Most are as a result of the character of the partner.

For you to be happy in your marriage,You really have to seek for a professional help before you marry and when you marry.

FACTS

Some men don’t tell you about relationship or marriage at the early stage, most of them are filled with thoughts and wants to be sure before even telling you what you want to hear, some just dey think if it will really work out why some no just want to give you hope when they are not all round ready but in all, women can make man ready for marriage at some point.

Do not see getting married as arriving.

This mindset has made alot of women to jump into marriage when they are not ready and because of the level of hardship in the world.

let me tell you, most men are scared to go into marriage when they are not financially ready but most women see marriage as they only way out of poverty, hunger and life problems.
As a woman when things are not going well as👉🏾
planned or in your parents house, what comes to your mind?
is it to find a man or to find a job?

your answer to this question give you an explanation of how dependent you will be and how likely you may meet the wrong person.

Comparing yourself to others and desiring to meet up with the society demand makes it frustrating.

Everyone is under pressure but the pressure we should avoid is the one that comes from others.

Guide your mental health

Think help Think Counseling

www.thesolacezone.com

Child Abuse.

by Leave a Comment

Childhood Abuse.
BoyChild

Many boys have been abused by one aunty during childhood and the question is ,does it have after effect? yes it has a psychological and social effect.

One of my clients was narrating how he was abuse by his aunty as a little boy, he said that any time his mother is not around, his aunty will buy biscuit for him and ask him to come and bath before she wil give him the biscuits,the innocent boy will accept and remove his clothes , his aunty will carry him on his chest and be rubbing her breast to his body, at a point, her aunty will insert his dick inside her pu.y and will be moaning deeply, according to him,she always do this to him,like almost every day his parents are not around.

He can’t speak to his parents because he is afraid of them amd he always isolate himself from others.

It was when he got to a particular age that he discovered that her aunty was actually having sex with him and this really made him to start having urge for sex at early stage to the point that he even do have the thought of having sex with his sisters.

According to him, there have been a lot of damage in his life and he needs help.

Parents please watch closer and be close to your children, engage them in a deep conversation and also hire a counselor when you notice unsual attitude or behavior from your children.

Thank God for Confidants Solace Zone, an organization that has professional mental health counselors and Volunteers in different helping professions who are ready to help you get better.

www.thesolacezone.com

What others pass through that we don’t know

by Leave a Comment

What others pass through that you don’t know.

I keep wondering if anyone do have a deep thoughts about how the life of prisoners is, especially the innocent ones.
the kind of life the live in the prison yards , a life of restrictions, deprivation, negligence, malnutrition and starvation.

These prisoners faces so much challenges and mental illness both inside and outside as ex convicts.No one wil like to associate his or herself to this kind of people because of different reason.

Do we still think about those women who got pregnant through rape or those whose partners left after pregnanting them or those whose parents abandoned and left to suffer with the poor boy whose future is still not in shape.

Are we even thinking about the young men who thinks above their age, struggle day and night just to survive and change his family stories or even the young women who has to do things that is abover her age just to survive.

Still thinking if you know that many relationship or unagreed failed marriages is as a result of differences without understanding and it is not the fault of anyone to fully understand you or your situation because they are not trained and they are human with emotions.
Do you think you should blame your friend, partner or family who couldn’t attend to your medical needs when you are ill at the initial time but have to take you to the hospital after it gets high and on getting there,you are told that you came late and there is need for operation or any medical trip? No i believe because he is not trained for it.

We are to put blame on people who are trained and can actually do something but didn’t try at all.

Alot of things are happening and many professionals are out there finding solutions to things but so many are not informed about the work of each professions.

Why will you allow yourself to reach to the stage of no return when you have someone you can talk to.
There is no field of work with no record of depression, even the celebrities whose life seems to be a happy one online are passing through one mental illness or the other.
What of those who got sacked and left with nothing to feed their family and those widows who have no one to fight for their rights.

I have been following a good number of philanthropist and Human rights activists and i am happy with what they are doing, alot may think it is for their personal gain but believe me, many of them just found themselves doing it without knowing and many is as a result of their past.
Do you also know that these people that help others derive joy doing so and it is a coping strategy for some mental illness.

As a counselor and humanitarian,i derive joy in helping and I have been on it for long now and at every stage i realize the fact that there is nothing more than happiness, whatever makes you happy without causing harm to others is Worth doing.

I know there are many who are on these categories and also those who are looking for a platform to reach out and help.
feel free to visit www.thesolacezone.com

Think help think counseling.

Healing the mind.

by Leave a Comment

Healing of the mind.

How can Cognitive Behavioral therapy help.

I had an argument with my best friend ,my boss always stressed me with work, one of my close friends got sick, I became sad, thinking the sadness will go away but I felt it for like weeks and it affected my behavior and I became down, unable to go out with friends, less sleep and i lost interest in things I love doing before. I decided to go and see my doctor because I am getting weak and i can’t eat.

My doctor advised me to see a mental health counselor, I heed to his advice and I booked for a session @ www.thesolacezone.com, my counselor discussed the symptoms I was having both physical and psychological,he linked up with a specialist who can give me some drugs to aid me with those symptoms that has to do with medication and scheduled another session with me, the next time I came,my counselor introduced me to Cognitive Behavioral therapy (CBT) ,he informed me about how my thoughts affected my believe and actions, he helped me restructure my irrational thoughts.
I do see my friends especially my best friend as my enermy, having these thoughts that she hate me and my boss,I see her as a bad person that always stress me at work ,and all these my negative thoughts made me not to enjoy any moment with them or even want to be with them, all thanks to my counselor who helped me realize how all these thoughts affects my productivity and social lifes, which lead to the mood I was having.

After the process and therapeutic session with my counselor , my irrational thoughts changes, I now see my bestie as someone who wants me to just be myself because she loves me and my boss as someone who believes in me and my skills which is why she always give me big task, I decided to meet her for an increase which she accepted and we are good.

Most times we neglect the important of seeking for a professional help when we are in such situation, we give negative meaning to every situation and it affects our behavior.

Think help think counseling.

www.thesolacezone.com

Does having sex makes you cheap as a lady?

by Leave a Comment

Does having sex makes you cheap as a lady ?

click https://thesolacezone.com/match/ to get the love you deserve and make friends.


How can one create value in their relationship?

Many ladies see sex as a big thing that they first thing that comes to their mind when a man approaches is that he is after my body which sometimes is true but having sex with someone you love or feel comfortable with doesn’t make you too cheap, the mistake is you not knowing exactly what you want in a man.


At the first encounter, it is advicable you engage in meaningful communication,it brings out the real self of every individual, communication involves both the verbal and nonverbal languages the person demonstrate, by doing so,you will be able to know what the person lacks and how you can contribute.Contributing to people’s life is creating value and you can’t contribute or creat value by just having sex or satisfying their sexual urge, this is the main reason why they can decide to go for another woman or man .


Many thinks that having sex on the first date makes them cheap,no it doesn’t,you are the one that place so much value on sex. Women use men sexually and dump them,the same way some women thinks men only come to have sex and nothing more,many women accept men or go to some men, just to feel their dic…k and dump them.
A society where things that are very important are neglected.
I know you may have heard that some women which you may be among,go back to men that treats them well on bed,it is also true that some men go back to women that treat them well on bed but there is something that makes a difference and that thing is creating value. If to have sex is creating value why do we still leave each other after engaging in it.
There are reasons why you should make a right chioce when it has to do with having sex. The fact that what most ladies place value on is their body makes it easier for them to feel used when a relationship is over and the fact that most men place so much value on things they have like money made them feel that what woman come for is their money even those that don’t have any.

The question is, are you creating value in your relationship or marriage,do you know how to creat value?
Have you thought about being in a relationship with someone whose weakness is your strength, have you thought of bringing up ideas that can spice up the existing ideas of your partner.
What if you act toward the ideas your partner have ,most people are good at procrastinating and if you are not a procrastinator, you can be of help to your partner and being of help to someone is part of creating value.

click https://thesolacezone.com/match/ to get the love you deserve and make friends.

You can still talk to a professional by clicking on get professional help.

www.thesolacezone.com

About Us

Therapy

Posts & Advice

Reach Out

Phone
+234 816 933 9653
Email
ReachOut@TheSolaceZone.com